7 Tips for When your Parent Says No to Assisted Living

The Arbors Blog
Posted by The Arbors on Jan 19, 2018 1:50:00 PM

Adult child caretaker talking with senior parent needing tips for when their parent says no to assisted living

Your aging parent simply says “no” anytime you try and talk with them about moving to an assisted living community. Maybe you’ve tried to approach the subject in every possible situation. From answering every one of their objections to having other family members talk with them – they still won’t even consider the idea. This can leave you feeling frustrated or disappointed. Try to remember, this isn’t just your decision to make. Your parents have feelings, too.

Keep in mind these seven tips for when your parent says no to assisted living.

  1. Listen to their concerns.

Actively listen to their concerns. Be responsive to their questions. This will show them that you hear their concerns and want their input on making the decision. And who knows? You may learn something from them, too.

  1. Do your research.

Know the facts about the assisted living community you’re suggesting. Does your parent hate cooking? Talk about the restaurant-style meals they’ll eat. Do they have an active social life they want to maintain? Mention the programs and activities available.

  1. Be patient.

Give your aging parent time to process this potential life-changing event. If the discussion gets heated, allow time for you and your parent to cool off before bringing up the subject again.

  1. Respect their history.

Remember that your parent has a meaningful history with their home. They raised a family there, lived with their life-long spouse and created memories. Is there home cozy and warm or elegant and upscale? Consider their current environment when looking at assisted living communities. Look for features that they can relate to in their own home.

  1. Reinforce their self-confidence.

Growing older can be difficult. Maybe your aging parent used to be a great cook, but they often burn things now. Talk about how they can still utilize their talents in assisted living, just with a little help. They can help cook for a special event in the community or maybe they offer a cooking class as an activity.

  1. Take it slow.

Understand that this situation may take longer than you expected. Introduce a new strategy gradually rather than trying it all at once. Start with trying to talk to them at home, then bring in the help of other family members or a doctor a few weeks later.

  1. Keep the focus on their health and well-being.

Focus on their overall health and well-being. Remind your aging parent that you care about their health and safety. Having them move to an assisted living community will help them be in a safer environment. 

how to have the talk about assisted living with your parent about assisted living

While having the conversation with your aging parent about moving to an assisted living community can be difficult, it doesn’t have to leave everyone feeling frustrated. Understand that your parents are going through a life changing event and they may require time to adjust to the idea of moving to a new environment.

Topics: assisted living

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